A chemistry professor couldn't resist interjecting a little philosophy into a class lecture. He interrupted his discussion on balancing chemical equations, saying, "Remember, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate!"
Q: How did the football cheerleader define hydrophobic on her chemistry exam?
A: Fear of utility bills.
The Official Unabashed Scientific Dictionary defines cation as a positively charged kitten.
2O was H2SO4.
Q: What is the chemical formula for candy?
A: Carbon-Holmium-Cobalt-Lanthanum-Tellurium or CHoCoLaTe
Susan was in chemistry.
Susan is no more, for what she thought was H